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Engage exists to provide perspective on culture through the eyes of a Biblical worldview, showing how that worldview intersects with culture and engages it.

We are a team of 20-somethings brought together by a common faith in Jesus Christ and employment in our parent organization American Family Association.

An Exhausted Confession

05/02/2016
Wesley Wildmon
Vice President of Outreach

“I am going to need you to extend me some grace over the next few weeks,” my wife said. It was the week we came home from the hospital after she gave birth to our first child I proudly thought it would not be a problem.

Though we were overflowing with joy, we were also fatigued. Our sleepless nights started in the hospital from the doctors checking on my wife and son and continued at home due to our newborn crying every few hours. Those first few weeks were rough as we adjusted to our new life as a family of three. Side note: being a good husband and father is tough at times. I had forgotten how well a human body can operate with no sleep. I am unsure at what point someone can be diagnosed with sleep deprivation, but I am convinced that I had passed it.

After my wife asked me to extend her grace in the coming weeks I thought, “Well, sure I will.” For those who have kids, you understand the physical adjustments for both the spouses. It turned out that in the coming weeks I was just as much in need of grace.

The first several weeks I was running off the spiritual joy of having our first baby. Anything and everything, I was all in to help. Nothing beats seeing and holding that which God created though my wife and me. As the weeks continued, the sleepless nights began to build and my Bible study, prayer time with my wife, and attitude began to suffer. Satan works his best in my life when I am fatigued. If I do not recognize this tactic early, it becomes a big issue. Just ask my wife.

I am reminded of Jesus in the wilderness when Satan tempted him. “Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. And the tempter came and said to him, ‘If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread.’ But he answered, ‘It is written, “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God”’” (Matthew 4:1-4).

Being a good husband and father is tough at times and It is toughest when I am exhausted. But Jesus calls me, and all of us, to confess when we are weak. Sometimes we are not aware of our own weaknesses and need Him to reveal those areas to us. In my exhaustion, I was too tired to recognize I was tired. But that was when I learned that in my weakness He is strongest in me. I have to rely on Him to have the strength to simply get out of bed, much less care for my wife and child.

Remember His Word. Jesus fought against Satan’s scheme of fatigue with the Word of God. Jesus remembered the story of the Israelites wandering in the wilderness, doubting God’s Word. In your weakness, quote Scripture. Even when it makes no sense and there is no strength within you to continue serving, continue giving of yourself. Even if when you feel like you just have to quit, don’t! We live not by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God. If God has promised it, you can take it to the bank.

Our little one is six months old now and I am getting much more sleep. We are certainly in a new chapter of life, no more sleeping in on Saturdays or late night movies, but we love this season because it includes our little one. I have still not mastered the perfect attitude at 3am feedings, but I am asking God to turn my weakness into part of my sanctification journey by confessing it to Him and trusting His Word.

Oh and one more thing, take a Sabbath day. My goodness, who would have ever thought we would ignore God telling us to take a chill day.

 

 

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